June 16, 2018

Spiritual Father, Birth Father, Wisdom Father

Research suggests that there are now three types of fathers. A study looking into the changing roles of modern day fathers reveals that dads are no longer recognized as the primary disciplinarians, and that they tend to belong to one of three categories.

Provider Dads

Provider Dads take on the more traditional male role of being the primary breadwinners, and tend to follow the parental direction of the caregiver who is not working, or is working part-time. Provider Dads stick to giving back-up to moms.  They help with the kids when asked or needed, as opposed to actively interacting with them around the clock.

Super-Sub Dads

Super-Sub Dads share some similarities with Provider Dads, as they too function in the traditional male role as the primary breadwinners, but they have more of a caregiver mentality when at home. Outside of work, these dads use a “tag team” system of parenting on weekdays, and caregiving on weekends, as well as taking-on tasks that used to be part of the moms’ responsibilities.

Career Dads

According to researchers, Career Dads are usually the primary caregivers while their partners work full-time or part-time. These dads enjoy staying at home with the children, and see themselves as being proactive and hands-on. Career Dads ignore gender stereotypes and often have the greatest breadth of familial responsibilities compared to the other two categories.

When I was growing up I always felt that my Birth Father Keshav N. Paudel was a man like no other. He gave me life, nurtured me, taught me, dressed me, disciplined me, fought for me, held me, shouted at me, kissed me, and most importantly… he loved me unconditionally.

Words simply cannot describe how important my father was to me, and what a powerful influence he continues to be in my life today.

As I entered the real world after school, I was introduced to my Wisdom Father James R. Cavender. He was completely different from both my Birth Father and my Spiritual Father.

He said welcome to the school of hard knocks! If you’re willing to put up with me for the years to come until I die, then I’ll show you the path. Let’s follow the basic principles which God has laid out for success:
  1. We’ll re-invest every penny we make.
  2. Find a way to survive, while you’re doing multiple things at the same time, without multitasking.
  3. Find the situation and deliver.
  4. Lifestyle comes with a price tag.
  5. Be loud and proud.
Many people think that God is present only at a distance. Some believe that if God is any way knowable, then the knowledge can only come after death. But the saints of all religions have proclaimed that God is knowable here and now, if we will just take the time to communicate with Him/Her. Unfortunately many religious traditions have lost touch with this most essential truth. It isn’t satisfying to the soul to just read or talk about our connection with Spirit. We yearn to actually experience the reality of our relationship with God.

I offer this Father’s Day gift to you as a simple reminder that God the Father is real and present in your life. Consciously enter into your relationship with Spirit by inwardly having a conversation with Him/Her during the day.

Let God be your inner companion and friend. Let this communication be natural and heartfelt. You don’t have to make deep pronouncements to God – unless you really want to. Experiment with the type of exchange that feels most comfortable to you. The only really essential part of this is that it must be sincere. Even sincere doubt is better than insincere praise.

The highest form of communication is that which bridges the gap between those communicating – creating oneness. It is this experience of oneness that we long for with our loved ones, and with God.

When we can perfect our inner communication with Spirit, we will consciously realize our oneness with all life – everywhere. Then, this won’t be an abstract concept, but an actual experience.

Father’s day isn’t really about giving Dad a gift. It’s about recognizing the gift of caring that fathers express when they help to put food on the table, teach their children how to ride a bike, cheer at soccer games, smile at graduations, give their daughters’ hands in marriage, giggle with their grandchildren, and most importantly, act as a channel for God’s love to flow through, and into the lives of their children.

For a father, Father’s Day isn’t so much about receiving the accolades of a job well-done (even though they may be well deserved!), but about giving thanks for the opportunity to give.

And remember, the greatest gift that we give our children is the actual expression of our love. It isn’t enough to feel love for them inside ourselves.  We need to express that love.

Take a moment each day and give your child the kind of hug that can leave no doubt that you really treasure their presence in your life. Of course, the greatest dad of all is the father of all life. So let’s take some time this Father’s Day to remember our Heavenly Father. Let’s share our innermost hopes, dreams, challenges, temporary setbacks, and victories.

Once we’ve had our say, let’s listen carefully… for God, the Father of us all, may have a gift in store for us, the gift of awareness of His infinite loving presence in our lives.

The Son had every opportunity to see the future and make the world the better place that he dreamed, and that was also the reason for his Father. Father saved a world of people who didn’t even know him, and in return he was all alone, but that is what a right path is like.

You are all alone. No one loves you. You were alone when you joined this world and you’ll be alone when you die. The only thing that matters is what you do while you’re here.

Are you making the right choices? What if the consequences of your decisions surface in thirty, sixty or ninety years?

We usually don’t think about the sacrifices that are made by others like fathers, husbands, wives, mothers, friends and the universal source of life science… UNTIL WE make the sacrifice.

Thank you, Vino Paudel

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